X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

Originally Reviewed

Sunday May 28, 2006

The second time around X-men: The Last Stand actually proves to be even more entertaining. Maybe it's due to the fact that the shock of many major characters being "killed off" is gone, but I definitely have to say I enjoyed this third installment of the X-men trilogy more the second time around.

X-Men: The Last Stand picks up where the second film left off after the death of Jean Gray. Cyclops still is unable to get over her death and is constantly tormented by her voice in his head. In an attempt to cease the voices Cyclops returns to lake where Jean was consumed by the water, her voice still beating in his brain, he rips off his glasses and blasts the lake, causing a whirlpool which somehow brings back Jean Gray! Except this isn't the regular Jean Gray, she's now so powerful she cannot control herself and destroys everything in her path, including some of the people she loves.

Meanwhile the United States is in the midst of a crisis with the formulation of a "cure" that will revert mutants back to human form. This "cure", obtained through the blood of a mutant child who has the power to neutralize any mutant powers, is being offered to all those who wish to become free of their "disease".

The "cure" ignites a war between Mutants and humans as Mutants, who are against it, see "the cure" as a weapon to destroy them. This hatred leads to the formation of a resistance, lead by Magneto. Magneto later acquires Jean Gray or "The Phoenix", which is the name of her dual personality, whose stronger powers have taken over her body and mind, and turns her into a walking weapon. With her and their band of mutants can the remaining few X-men take on what happens to be an impossible feat?

My major complaint the first time around was that the X-men, in general, were pretty weak, I take that back. When you think about it those who they systematically knock off didn't offer much in the series anyways, other than Professor X. Cyclops contributed nothing the series expect being a whiner a majority of the time, Rogue never really helped out in any way and while Professor X was a major part of the series when it came to the big action scenes he never did much at all. So sufficed to say this film gets rid of a lot of dead weight, which hopefully will make room for some better characters if there is another film.

Wolverine still tops the list as the best X-man in the movie, followed by the newly introduced Beast (played by none other than TV's Frasier) who was rather interesting. I thought the villains were very well done, and really preferred Jean Gray as more of a villainous character, I thought she did an excellent job and some of those special effects they used during her transformation were awesome, making her appear pretty evil at times. On the other hand the makeup job they did in the beginning off the film on Professor X and Magneto was horrible! They tried to make the two look younger, but they turned out like bad wax museum faces.

Overall, second time around, X-men: The Last Stand stands up as a worthy second sequel. Still not the best in the series but it was definitely more entertaining, and the special effects are quite superb! So with three of the main X-men dead and another one without powers, and the main villains defeated what is the future of the series. Well some say it's the end, others say there will be more. If you want to base your opinion on the Magneto teaser at the end of the film or the possible return of Professor X, vaguely hinted in a 30 second clip after the credits then there might be another film. Personally I believe it will take a whole lot of outrageous explanations to try and bring everyone back from the chaos that this film involves but it wouldn't surprise me if they tried to do it. 

 8/10

Elizabethtown (2005)

Originally Reviewed 

Tuesday February 21, 2006

 

Elizabethtown is one of those films you must have extreme patience to watch because of the fact the beginning is so horrible that after about 10 minutes of watching many people will have the urge to shut it off and chalk it up to a bad rental. But if you give this film a little time the growth of the story and characters transforms Elizabethtown into an extraordinarily entertaining film which surprised me after such a awful start.

Drew Baylor (Orlando Bloom) is a designer for a major shoe company, for eight years he has been working on a design that he hopes will revolutionize the shoe business and the way people live. Unfortunately when the shoe is finally released it tanks big time, the public hates it and thinks it’s totally ridiculous. The company puts all the blame on Drew and keeps pushing the fact that his design has lost them almost a billion dollars. Its just like a big company, blaming the small guy for everything when in all actuality they were the ones who indeed thought it was a good enough design otherwise why would they have manufactured them!?! Drew is forced to do an interview for a magazine taking full responsibility for his creation and then sent packing.

With the last eight years of his life now down the toilet Drew goes home and plans to end it all, until he gets a call from his sister who tells him their father just died of a heart attack visiting his brother in Elizabethtown, Kentucky. Drew is sent to Kentucky to retrieve the body of his father and warned to not get involved with his father's side of the family, whom his mother says resents her for taking his father away from Elizabethtown. Drew boards a plane to Louisville, Kentucky where he meets Claire (Kirsten Dunst) a flight attendant who decides to constantly ramble on about peoples names, and takes it upon herself to draw him maps of where he needs to go.

Arriving at Elizabethtown, Drew begins to realize how much his father was loved by the town; everyone seems to know of Drew and his "success" in shoe design, since the bad news has not yet been published. That night Drew, wanting to talk to someone, calls up Claire (the over zealous flight attendant who left him her number) because no one else seems to be answering their phone. The two stay up all night talking to each other about life, love and family.

Throughout the rest of the film Drew begins to realize that failure is a part of life. He begins to learn more about his father, who he never found the time to get to know, who was obviously very proud of him. Drew begins to realize that he does have something to offer and that even though he feels alone there are people out there that care for him, and he therefore does have something to live for.

Elizabethtown is a very enjoyable and touching story about a guy who has given up on life, and through the death of his father he begins to realize that there is so much in life that is worth living. As I stated in the beginning if you can get through the extremely horrible beginning of this film you'll be pleasantly surprised at the remainder of the film. In my opinion cutting out or rewriting the first 25 minutes would have made it extensively better. Cameos by Alec Baldwin and Jessica Biel only add to the awful introduction, their lines are terrible and they only make the beginning even worse. It really begins to feel like the first half hour belongs to an entirely different film. Not only is the story and dialogue a whole lot better, but the acting and the character's personalities are completely different.

Kirsten Dunst's performance is horrible in the beginning, her southern accent is so embellished that it becomes almost insulting, then as the film progresses she becomes less annoying and her accent disappears more and more. The scene on the plane is ridiculous in the sense that Drew is the only passenger! Only in the Twilight Zone would it be realistic for someone to have an entire 747 to themselves... I would like to know the name of the airline because I would fly with them all the time.

In the end, I'm glad I gave Elizabethtown a shot and didn't shut it off 20 minutes through. The final hour is definitely worth the horrible beginning; the music in the film is quite good and adds a lot to the film. If the beginning had been better I would have no problem with giving this film a 9.  The writers screwed up big on that because it's the beginning that grabs people’s intention and retain it, but in this film it will ultimately lose a lot of viewers who otherwise might have ended up enjoying it. 

8/10

Smallville: Season 2 (2002)

Originally Reviewed 

Monday January 8, 2007

Season 2 delves into Clark's search for the truth behind who he is and why he was sent to earth. The Luthor's also begin to play a larger role in the season as well as Lex and Lionel continually try to out wit each other which usually leads to disaster for those around them. They also continue to obsess over the mysteries of the octagonal disc which Lex had discovered in Season 1, and as new discoveries continue to surface their obsession only grows as they are still unaware the importance that Clark Kent plays in it all.

Character Development:

Clark Kent: Clark begins to learn more about his origins when he discovers an underground cavern containing drawings and writings depicting a man falling from the stars with the ability to shoot fire from his eyes. The cavern contains a hole in the wall in the shape of the octagonal key, when Clark places the key in the wall it allows him to translate the writing and sets forth a series of events, one of which is his contact with the voice of Jorel (his biological father) which informs him he is to begin on his destined path in life. Clark doesn't wish to follow the path set forth for him by Jorel believing his plans are for him to become ruler of Earth. In his despair to rid himself of Jorel, Clark destroys his ship which leads to consequences that end up hurting those he loves and putting the relationship he was finally able to build with Lana in Jeopardy.

Lex Luthor: After organizing an employee buyout of the Smallville Luthor Corp plant Lex starts his own company, Lex Corp. Although the corporate wars between him and his father continue as Lionel tries to take back what Lex was able to snatch away from him. Lex trumps his father again when he gains historical conservation rights over the land that Lionel was planning to build on after Clark's discovery of the underground caverns sparks Lex's curiosity. Lex has also vowed to the Kent’s that he has ceased his investigation of Clark but there are many instances throughout the season which suggest Lex still hasn't given up on his obsession, an obsession which seems to see new light after the discovery of the caves and his suspicion that Clark knows more about them than he is leading on to believe.

Lana Lang: Lana's emotional turmoil continues through Season 2 as she breaks up with Whitney, who joined the army and shipped out, finding out her father wasn't actually her biological father and that her bio dad was still alive, and new feelings for Clark Kent. On top of that Lana moves in with Chloe and her dad after her Aunt gets married and moves to Metropolis, which ends up being quite an interesting situation when both girls have pretty strong feelings for Clark Kent.

Chloe Sullivan & Pete Ross: Chloe wins the award for the most annoying character of the season, her love affair with Clark Kent becomes quite ridiculous as she practically goes into mental breakdown every time she sees Clark with Lana. This obsession grows so large that when Lana and Clark finally get together Chloe decides to betray Clark in return for him not being honest about his relationship with Lana. Chloe excepts an internship with the Daily Planet from Lionel Luthor under the terms that she is to investigate Clark and present him with any information she can find. As for Pete Ross his character has a little more of a role this season, after Pete discovers the spaceship in a field Clark is forced to tell him the truth or risk losing him as a friend. Pete becomes Clark's sidekick of sorts and also his moral support.

Lionel Luthor: Lionel is temporarily blinded after an operation was performed on him due to the disaster in the finale of Season 1. Lionel hires Martha Kent as his assistant, she enjoys working for him until she discovers he is in the possession of the octagonal disc, a safe full of refined meteor rocks and a file on Clark. The battle between Lex and Lionel continues and many surprises pop up, such as Lex's half brother Lucas, and Lionel's hold over Chloe Sullivan.

Top 5 Episodes:

Aired 2/11/03

Lex hunts down and finds his half brother Lucas (after the discovery that he had one in a previous episode). Lionel claimed he had died before his first birthday but of course that was a lie. Lucas ends up becoming the key to a possible take over of Luthor Corp by Lex, but he isn't aware yet of the possibly that maybe Lionel wanted Lucas to be found. With the return of the "prodigal son" Lex sees himself banished from the mansion while Lucas takes his place in the Luthor family, but Lucas isn't about to be played for a fool, he's suspicious of Lionel and his alleged blindness.  It's a great episode that really shows how twisted the Luthor family is and the lengths that they will go to, to out play each other.

Aired 10/15/02

Green Kryptonite can kill him, but Red Kryptonite can make him go rebel! When Clark slips on his class ring, which turns out to have a red kryptonite stone in it, things begin to go crazy. Clark turns into a girl crazy, party crashing, back talking, motorcycle riding dude and the problem is there is no way of stopping him! This is the first of many episodes featuring the Red K, I always get a kick out of these episodes because they're really fun, and it's always nice to see an alternate version of the reserved Clark Kent.

Aired 10/8/02

Pete discovers Clark's spaceship which had been thrown into a nearby field when the twisters hit Smallville. He gets really excited about it, and Clark has a hard time convincing him to keep the ship a secret for the time being. When Clark and Jonathan sneak over to Pete's place and take the ship during the night Pete spots them and gets furious with Clark. When Pete threatens to tell Chloe about the ship and Clark stealing it, Clark decides they best thing to do is to come clean to Pete. At first Pete is quite ticked at Clark for hiding all of it from him, but when the meteor infected Dr. Hamilton finds out about the ship and Pete's knowledge of the owner he finally realizes why Clark kept the truth a secret.  A pretty exciting episode which is a starting point for Lionel’s interest in Clark Kent and the octagonal disc, and the first occurrence of a supporting character finding out the truth about Clark Kent.

Aired 2/25/03

After Clark puts the octagonal disc into the cave wall he's able to decipher the writings within the cave. Strange things then begin to occur, one of them being Clark’s sudden burst of fire from the eyes on the side of the barn which leaves the imprint of a Kryptonite symbol. Chloe begins to buzz all over the story and Clark tries to calm her down explaining it's probably a prank, she then informs him that Dr. Virgil Swann, one of the smartest men in the world has been trying to get a hold of him... if it's a hoax it must be a pretty big one to fool him.  This is  the episode which finally presents Clark with some explanations of who he is and where he came from. The late Christopher Reeves plays Dr. Virgil Swan in one of the best episodes of the series not just the season.

Aired 5/20/03

Jorel makes first contact with Clark and informs him of his destiny and that he will soon have to leave all those that he loves and begin on his new path. This freaks Clark out so he decides to destroy the spaceship in hopes of getting rid of Jorel and putting his past behind him, but his choice only ends up causing him even more pain, and leads him to run away to Metropolis. The finale also sees Lex getting married to Helen Brice and the crashing of his plane in the middle of the ocean on their way to their honeymoon.  This is probably one of the most emotional episodes of the season, which is one reason I thought it was really well done. The story was well written, and it's a really great lead in to season 3!

Final Thoughts:

Overall, Season 2 is much improved upon in comparison to Season 1. This season delves more into the secrets in the life of Clark Kent and the Luthor's, who seem to only be a step behind Clark unaware that everything they are obsessed with all ties back to the Kansas farm boy. In the end, it's a great season with a lot of twists and turns!

9/10

Snatch (2000)

Originally Reviewed 

Saturday September 1, 2007

Snatch is one of those films I think about not bothering writing a review for because I wasn't able to make it through the whole film. But what is the purpose of this site if not to enlighten and share my opinion, and if I’m able to save a few people a few bucks and an hour of their life then I've accomplished something.

I know I'm going to receive major disagreement on this rating since it seems films with convoluted plots, mega stars and the use of the F-word every 30 seconds appear to be strangely popular with the viewers and even more strangely the critics. It seems if you add 150+ F-words to any script it's instantly praised as a great film, though I'm quite at a loss for understanding this logic. Call it "real" if you want to, I call it limited vocabulary and poor writing, if they used the word "fart" 150+ times I'd get tired of it fast too. I also found it completely strange that in the 45 minutes I watched this film they managed to say the F-word about 70 times yet I never once heard them utter any of the other popular obscenities, why so keen of the F-bomb and totally diss the other three and four letter wonders?

After watching 45 minutes of this film not only was I not impressed by anything but completely bored by a plot that even Roger Ebert states "goes nowhere". Also I "enjoyed" attempting to understand what everyone was saying, while they are able to clearing enunciate the F-word, understanding anything else is quite a gamble. Ironically I had an easier time understanding Brad Pitt's character, who none of the other characters in the film seemed to be able to understand!

Overall, I found Snatch boring, pointless and found it made absolutely no sense whatsoever. The actors all slur their words, the script is a mess and filled with constant obscenities in an attempt to fill glaring void. Don't mistake my rating as being based on F-word usage, if they had taken all the F-words out I would still be rating it incredibly low. I do believe, however, that repetitive use of an obscenity shows an extreme lack of creativity and only highlights a bad script even more as the word quickly loses any meaning or sense of expression and turns into a filler. What this rating is based on, is the entire 45 minutes I watched, and frankly if a film can't impress me in some way in that amount of time another hour isn't going to change that. I'm sure a lot of you love this film but for those of you who aren't looking for something that appears as if it was written by a bunch of illiterate English crooks I hope I save you some time.

2/10